Loophole
by Lyrical Logic
Summary: She would always be there. Watching, watching, waiting, waiting...


poem...ish

* * *

Loophole

_He_ thought it would last forever. As long as Haurhi didn't know it-

Would

Should

Could

Stay the same forever

Eternity and a day

_Infinity_

_She_ knew it-

Couldn't

Wouldn't

Shouldn't

Forever was impossible no equation could prove-

_Error 1_

_System fix_

_Protocol 1x_

So she ran away...

She locked her heart in the deepest darkest scrap of winter encased in the impenetrable snow that gave her, her name. She could not afford to be complacent emotions were a liability, with liability came decreased survival factors, with decreased survival factors came death and with death, failure.

And she could not fail them.

So she locked away her now beating emotions and made do watching the world through brilliantly bright eyes.

She was content with her small happiness

That she could watch him and the others try to avoid Haurhi's wrath and gain the upper hand made her feel something bubbly and beautiful.

_Happiness_

Was that her first real emotion?

After everything he had done, to get her to stand up to Haurhi she thought it must have been triumph when her first emotion had to have been the happiness she felt when he noticed her.

_Him _

He was the one with real power

He was the one who had everything

He had Haurhi

He had Mikuru

He had Itsuki

He had her

He had all there devotion and worship

He was Haurhi's conscience

He was Mikuru's knight in shining armour

He was Itsuki's confident

He was her love-

_Input error _

Emotions are dangerous

Ryoko taught her that

'_It was bubbling inside forcing-'_

Happiness

'_She could barely move it was just-'_

Grief

'_She felt it burning her and rising-'_

Anger

With every new swirl of emotion that hit her another came to counter it, and each new wave brought a new experience.

She found herself wanting to love, hate, grieve, anger to be more than synergy.

_More than the sum of her parts_

_Error_ _2_

_Emergency fix, access code 39q_

_access denied_

So she sat

And watched

And waited

She drank her tea and read her novels

Watching

Watching

Waiting

Waiting

She gave up on her memories

She drank tea once outside and noticed that the cherry blossoms always fell in the same sort of algorithm. He came out soon after and sat next to her. She drank her tea and off-handedly remarked about her discovery. He sat up and absent mindedly asked her if it ever got lonely.

That was when it cracked

Her beautiful mirror that was carefully built of all her working and equation was shot down by one word

Lonely

Was she lonely?

Was her existence lonely?

Had The Entity-

_System failure _

_Reboot _

_1_

_2_

_3_

Then she failed them

She could barely breathe

Barely move

Barely think

Haurhi got her out of that

All of them

And she failed them

When she returned form empty space The Entity had sent her a warning

She lost her power

She was now more useless then ever and it scared her

She was afraid of losing their faith

Losing their affection

Losing his love

She treasured that

He loved her and she love-

_Error 3 _

Breakdown

_Enter name_

She couldn't risk them anymore

Haurhi used her

The Entity used her

He used her

She owed Haurhi

She was bound to The Entity

She loved him

She wanted to be more than synergy

She wanted to be able to move without which ever infinite source controlled telling her where to go.

She wanted to be her

_Yuki Nagato_

Without anyone telling her what she wanted.

She would still watch

She would still wait

But never where you could see her

She was going to take the intelligence of The Entity

The emotions of her friends

The gift of her love

And she was going to run

And run

And run

Till she found the infinite source and the loophole that would let her be what she wanted

_Yuki Nagato_

* * *

_­_

AUTHOR RANT

The end

This one was really fun to write

I do so love Yuki

If you didn't get it yet its about what happens at the end of the series when Yuki finally fails Kyon and her emotions get the best of her.

REVIEW

pwease?


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